new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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