I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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