Already got asked if we're dating
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize
