We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
