Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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