hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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