You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Holy shit dude........stairs
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
