I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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