it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize
