Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
