non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
