none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
