Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
