wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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