bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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