they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Randomize
