Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Is Oprah even human
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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