At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Randomize