who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
