Umm I'm too high to move.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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