I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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