What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
its liver damage thursday
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
