Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
