Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
