Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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