its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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