Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
