Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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