Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Is Oprah even human
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I need a beard to bite.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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