I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
