so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
