Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
