I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
