Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
