google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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