the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
