Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
