The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
