Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
