is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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