No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
