i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Randomize
