Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
