Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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