That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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