Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
