you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.�
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize