Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
