I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
