I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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