Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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